Somewhere over the rainbow

I always take the view that every cloud has a silver lining and that problems are just obstacles that need to be overcome. In fact without the obstacles how would we ever have the opportunity to learn and grow?

Some people say that taking this positive attitude all the time is not being realistic. I say we create our own reality and that if we focus on the worst case scenario, that's what we'll get. The teachers of "The Secret" - Jack Canfield, Bob Proctor, John Assaraf etc., all speak of this and if you are familiar with their stories, amongst many others, you will know this to be true.

By all means prepare for anticipated challenges, (it would be foolish not to), but don't get hung up on them and let them take over your existence.

Decide what you want, get clear on your outcome, and think through the potential barriers that may get in your way. Having done this you can create the action plans that ensure you move closer to achieving what you aim for. As you progress you may find unexpected obstacles come up anyway and by taking the view that you can get past or over them, you are more likely to come up with the solution(s).

I've had a few conversations recently with friends about the power of possibility and for me, whilst sometimes things can be a struggle and challenging, I always come back to the fact that anything really is possible if we believe it to be so.

Just yesterday I was listening to a success based audio programme (tip- listen to these often and notice how your attitude changes over time), and we were reminded that successful people focus on success and unsuccessful people focus on the things they don't have. It makes a lot of sense really. If we focus on what we want, the success we are looking for, whether it be health, wealth, great relationships, business success, finance or simply happiness, we will see the opportunities to create momentum towards that success. If, however, we focus on what we don't want, debt, stress, illness, bankruptcy, divorce etc, we are just reinforcing all those things in our lives and missing the clues on how to move forward.

So, I don't apologise for taking a positive, possibility oriented approach to life. If having a positive attitude, despite all our day-to-day challenges is being unrealistic, I'm not sorry. In fact, I highly recommend it!

Playing the blame game

Its been an interesting week... I used to say this to my coach almost every time we spoke and it always made us smile because we knew that there was so much more to it than "interesting".

The ups and downs of business can be a worry for many and certainly many people I have spoken to in recent days are bullish on the face of it and at the very least cautious. Some are downright worried.

The US election has been entertaining regardless of which side of the fence you sit. The razzamatazz that surrounds this most important of events at some level seems to have undermined the more significant issues.

People are playing the blame game, not only at a personal level, but at a corporate and even national level. They are looking to Barack Obama to wave some sort of magic wand and correct the US economic problems and this in turn will solve the global crisis we are apparently having, or going to have, depending on who you listen to.

I'm not sure that one man has that much influence and even if he does, is it right that we look to him and hold him responsible for success or failure in the future?

What does it say about our society that we hold one person ultimately reponsible? Perhaps it's easier to look to the leader of the most powerful nation on earth to solve the current challenges than it is to take personal responsibility and do whatever it takes to move forward ourselves?

Whatever our own current challenges are, financial, business success, a boss we don't like or can't get on with, a spouse or partner relationship problem, children and their exams, the weather and dark nights closing in, etc. etc. it occurs to me that I would prefer to hold myself accountable than rely on someone or something else to wave a magic wand.

At least, by holding myself accountable and responsible for my own results, I can look myself squarely in the mirror and say "you are doing your best".

Selling from a Buyer's Perspective

If you enter sales techniques into internet search engines you will create 8 million results, give or take a few.

On the first page you will see AIDA - get their attention, create interest and then desire and complete the process with a call to action.

Following this you will see such attractive titles as “successful sales presentations”, “using presentation technology”, “handling objections”, “negotiating a sale”, “dealing with sales nerves” and so on and so on.

What so much sales advice fails to consider is that the buyer is the one in control. The buyer is the one making the decisions. The buyer is the one who has stuff on his or her mind.

There is no such thing as selling, only buying!

People buy for just two reasons:

· To solve a problem they have, or

· To achieve a dream they desire

So when you are next considering putting together that super whizz presentation, or creating all those objection handling scenarios, or buying the flash suit and the designer shoes to wow your audience at the next sales meeting, consider this: what’s going on for them, the buyer? What do they need? How can you help them? Don’t sell, let them buy.

Selling from a Buyer’s Perspective is sales training with a difference. You will get into the mind of the buyer and talk to them from their perspective. It’s not about techniques and sales models and processes, it’s about understanding and empathy and communication. It’s not about ABC (always be closing), it’s about asking and listening. It’s not about AIDA, it’s about helping people make the buying decision that is right for them.

Will you increase sales by attending this training? Absolutely.
Will you be more confident when you are negotiating the deal? Certainly.
Will you find out what is really going on for the buyer? Definitely.

This training is designed and delivered by people who are purchasing professionals and experts in understanding how people communicate.

It is designed for people who want to increase sales and know there is a better way than trying to manipulate people through techniques that only work for the short term.

For further information or to book on the next open training visit www.simonsmithcoaching.com and take your sales process to a whole new level.

What would you do with more time?

What would you do with more time?

We all dream of having more time. Some of us struggle with too many things to do. We're overwhelmed and working more hours than ever.

I keep hearing from people that their biggest frustration is time management, and being a lot less productive than they know they should be. It's not surprising - we've all got more to do, less time to do it in, and more distractions than ever. I know some of this rings true for you.

So I want to tell you about the upcoming Time Experts Telesummit which has been brought to my attention by my very dear friend and performance coach, Kris Carey. The event brings together 10 world-class experts on time management and productivity. They will teach you ways to work with less stress, eliminate distractions that steal your time, and double your productivity.

You can listen to all the teleseminars for free if you sign up by 14th October (which is when the Telesummit starts).

As you well know, I am very careful about who I recommend. This group of 10 bestselling authors and thought leaders is truly impressive. Their techniques and methods have been successfully practiced by thousands of people.

One of the experts, Dr. Neil Fiore, wrote the bestselling book on procrastination on Amazon. Another expert, Mike Song, is possibly the best known expert on email efficiency in the US. There is even a Zen master sharing his wisdom about time.

Just a few hours of learning from these experts will have a huge impact on your productivity - for the rest of your life. It only takes learning one key productivity technique or practice (and a few hours of listening) for you to have a major breakthrough on your biggest time management challenge.

The event is designed so that you can listen to each of the teleseminars on the phone or via the web. I've signed up for this event, and am looking forward to soaking up the knowledge of these experts.

I trust you will join me. Sign up here for the Time Experts Telesummit - Registration is free before 14th October.

Dance in the rain

It's been a tough week out there. The financial markets and banking problems have been the centre of attention in all the media, and despite my own best efforts in not watching the news on TV, listening to it on the radio or reading the press, I have not been able to avoid it entirely.

A friend emailed me yesterday and described how they had been discussing with their grandmother how it's difficult to move forward in business right now, more using her as a sounding board than anything else, and her response had been really thought provoking: "Life is not about how to survive in the storm, it's about learning how to dance in the rain".

This comment reminded me how much we can learn from those around us who are at the two ends of the lifespan; children and the elderly. Children are so allowing of what happens in the world. They see only possibility and have a ferocious curiousity for discovering new things. The elderly have seen it and done it and know that there is so much more to enjoying life than the trappings we all seem to strive for in this day and age. They know that life is in fact much easier now than it has ever been and they often look back at "the good old days" with fond affection, even though times may have been tougher.

We take so much for granted in this modern world of gadgets and technology. We have luxuries, holidays, cars and homes that earlier generations could have only dreamed of, yet we believe we can't afford everything we want. When you watch a child splashing in the puddles on a rainy afternoon, do they have any idea that we are supposed to be having a tough time and can't afford all those things we say we need? No, they are simply enjoying the moment, learning how to dance in the rain.

I think my friend's grandmother got it right. If we stop trying to survive the storm and just take time to dance in the rain, we may in fact find that life isn't so bad really. We don't have to buy into the idea that times are tough. They just are what they are. We can choose to be miserable and blame the economy, the government and the banks, or we can choose to dance and play in the puddles. I know what I'm going to do!

I'm not participating!

Dr. Ivan Misner, founder of BNI and member of Jack Canfield's "Transformational Leadership Council" encouraged his members last week in his newsletter to state "I'm not participating in a recession!" Quite right too!

We all have a choice about how we feel and I encourage people I work with to observe their own language and change it when they find themselves using negative language or having thoughts that are focused on what may go wrong. Some will criticise this approach and say that one needs to be realistic. So I ask you "what is realistic?"

If realism is allowing oneself to be negatively affected by circumstances outside of them, or by comments someone else makes, then give me the alternative every time.

In their book "The Amazing Power of Deliberate Intent" Esther and Jerry Hicks, or more accurately, the "collective consciousness" called Abraham, asks "why would you want to accept or "face a reality" that is not pleasing when you can create a reality that IS pleasing?"

My view is simply this: if you know that you do have a choice about how you feel, then wouldn't it serve you better to choose a feeling of empowerment and positive energy rather than allow yourself to be drawn into a place of negativity? So, by keeping an eye on the language we use, we can create the positive energy we would prefer, just by changing what we say and the thoughts we think.

So no, I am not participating in a recession and I invite you to make the same choice!

Collaborate for Growth

Much is made of the power of networking and building your network. It is said that you are the sum of the five people you spend most time with.

If this is true, and I believe it is, then it makes sense to surround yourself with like minded people who add value to your life and you in turn add value to theirs.

If you think about it, have you ever found yourself being drained of energy by being in the company of someone who is constantly whining and moaning about how unfair life is, or how everything bad that is apparently happening to them is the fault of someone else?

When you are in this position, what do you do about it? Do you get drawn in and affirm what they are saying? Do you ask them to stop whinging because you don't want to be part of it? Do you walk away and remove yourself from the conversation or do you simply just put up with it and tell yourself that's just the way they are?

Being in business can be a lonely environment, particularly in the early days. Finding people who reflect how you think, who have similar values, who offer complementary services or products to yours, can be a great antedote to the dis-ease of getting involved in the "life's a downer" club. Furthermore, they can motivate and inspire you, support your projects and ideas, become an advocate of your work to others, or indeed form a partnership in which "two heads are better than one", creating a product or service far more powerful than each individual might have created on their own.

So next time you meet someone for the first time consider how you might be aligned and then ask yourself "is there an opportunity to form an alliance that is mutually supportive and potentially profitable, not only in terms of money but also in respect of motivation, inspiration and creation?".

When you do this you will often find that those you might have considered competitors previously, may in fact be your biggest allies.

When great minds come together the possibilities are endless!

What do you stand for?

I received an email this morning from my coach in Sydney and it literally stopped me in my tracks. It contained a story which I decided to share with you a little further below.

We talk about taking 100% responsibility for our lives. We say that the way we feel, the results we get, the responses we get from others around us, is all a choice. We discuss getting out of the blame game and creating the life we want and the goals we desire.

The story simply had me consider “what do I choose to stand for?” regardless of what I have achieved yet, or may want to achieve in the future, despite the successes I have created or the feedback I have used when outcomes have been “unexpected”.

Many people in business try and sell what they have to sell without consideration for what people actually need or want. Some businesses “go for the close” before asking their customers “what do you need?” or “how can I help you?” Occasionally businesses will force their product or service on someone and they may even buy, once.

Many businesses are so focused on their “competition” they forget to see how they can add value to their own customers. They are constantly looking for the opportunity to “beat the competition” rather than look to improve what they do for benefit of being better than they themselves are right now. Perhaps the only competition we have in business is ourselves?

But what do these businesses stand for? What do you stand for in your business, your life?

This story may help…Would you have made the same choice?

Two Choices

At a fundraising dinner for a school that serves children with learning disabilities, the father of one of the students delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended.

After extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question:'When not interfered with by outside influences, everything nature does is done with perfection.Yet my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do.Where is the natural order of things in my son?'

The audience was stilled by the query.

The father continued. 'I believe that when a child like Shay, who was mentally and physically disabled comes into the world, an opportunity to realize true human nature presents itself, and it comes in the way other people treat that child.'Then he told the following story:

Shay and I had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball. Shay asked, 'Do you think they'll let me play?'

I knew that most of the boys would not want someone like Shay on their team, but as a father I also understood that if my son were allowed to play, it would give him a much-needed sense of belonging and some confidence to be accepted by others in spite of his handicaps.

I approached one of the boys on the field and asked (not expecting much) if Shay could play. The boy looked around for guidance and said, 'We're losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him in to bat in the ninth inning.'

Shay struggled over to the team's bench and, with a broad smile, put on a team shirt. I watched with a small tear in my eye and warmth in my heart. The boys saw my joy at my son being accepted.

In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three.

In the top of the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the right field. Even though no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be in the game and on the field, grinning from ear to ear as I waved to him from the stands.

In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shay's team scored again.

Now, with two outs and the bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base and Shay was scheduled to be next at bat.

At this juncture, do they let Shay bat and give away their chance to win the game?Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball.

However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher, recognizing that the other team was putting winning aside for this moment in Shay's life, moved in a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least make contact.

The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed. The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly towards Shay. As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball right back to the pitcher.

The game would now be over.

The pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could have easily thrown the ball to the first baseman.

Shay would have been out and that would have been the end of the game.

Instead, the pitcher threw the ball right over the first baseman's head, out of reach of all team mates. Everyone from the stands and both teams started yelling, 'Shay, run to first!Run to first!'

Never in his life had Shay ever run that far, but he made it to first base. He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled.

Everyone yelled, 'Run to second, run to second!'

Catching his breath, Shay awkwardly ran towards second, gleaming and struggling to make it to the base. By the time Shay rounded towards second base, the right fielder had the ball, the smallest guy on their team, who now had his first chance to be the hero for his team.He could have thrown the ball to the second-baseman for the tag, but he understood the pitcher's intentions so he, too, intentionally threw the ball high and far over the third-baseman's head.

Shay ran toward third base deliriously as the runners ahead of him circled the bases toward home. All were screaming, 'Shay, Shay, Shay, all the Way Shay'

Shay reached third base because the opposing shortstop ran to help him by turning him in the direction of third base, and shouted, 'Run to third!‘Shay, run to third!'

As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams, and the spectators, were on their feet screaming, 'Shay, run home! Run home!'

Shay ran to home, stepped on the plate, and was cheered as the hero who hit the grand slam and won the game for his team.

'That day', said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, 'the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of true love and humanity into this world'.

Shay didn't make it to another summer. He died that winter, having never forgotten being the hero and making me so happy, coming home and seeing his Mother tearfully embrace her little hero of the day!

And the foot note that came with this story:

We all send thousands of jokes through the e-mail without a second thought, but when it comes to sending messages about life choices, people hesitate. The crude, vulgar, and often obscene pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion about decency is too often suppressed in our schools and workplaces.

If you're thinking about forwarding this message, chances are that you're probably sorting out the people in your address book who aren't the 'appropriate' ones to receive this type of message Well, the person who sent you this believes that we all can make a difference.We all have thousands of opportunities every single day to help realize the 'natural order of things.'

So many seemingly trivial interactions between two people present us with a choice:Do we pass along a little spark of love and humanity or do we pass up those opportunities and leave the world a little bit colder in the process?

A wise man once said every society is judged by how it treats it's least fortunate amongst them.

You now have two choices: 1. Delete 2. Forward

May your day, be a Shay Day.

I receive many stories and video clips every day, many if which will invite the reader to forward it to other people. For me, my choice is to ignore that invitation as I, like you no doubt, don’t want to add to people’s inbox just for the sake of it.

Today however, I made a choice. This choice is based simply on the question I asked at the top of this article “what do I choose to stand for?”

Imagine a business world where people made choices like the baseball team in the story. Imagine a business world where everyone truly wanted to support each other to be successful rather than just “cut each other’s throats” for the sake of the quick sale. Imagine a business world that believed in “win/win” in the true spirit of the principle so well described by Stephen Covey in his book. Imagine your business if everyone you encountered tried to help you be successful and you in turn tried to help them.

Would you prefer to go to work each day knowing that everyone you meet wants to help and support you to win, or do you prefer the cut throat competitive world of mistrust and deviousness that results in win/lose or lose/win?

So ultimately, you really do have a choice and my success tip this week is simply this:

Ask yourself, “What do I choose to stand for?”

I trust you do indeed have a “Shay day” ;o)


If you want to know more about how leadership coaching and training can help you improve your results in business we will be happy to discuss this with you. Contact us here.

Do your planning and development now and stay ahead of the competition

It always interests me when I hear people in business say that it isn't possible to do anything during the summer because everyone is away on holiday. It seems that because we take a week or two for a break some time during July and August that the entire country comes to a stop!

Is this true? Well of course not. In fact, my experience is that typically most business owners I know work through the vast array of bank holidays we have to endure as they can get so much more completed on these days. Furthermore, they are at their office enjoying the peace and quiet in the belief that everyone else has taken the day off.

If we applied similar thinking during the entire summer what would our business look like? Just because our staff, customers and suppliers take a summer break does not mean that everything stops entirely for two months. In fact, this is exactly the time when we could, and should, complete our planning and development so that we hit the ground running in the autumn and get a head start on the competition.

This is the perfect time, it seems to me, to review the business and it's strategies, assess goals, certainly plan and possibly deliver training, look for the new opportunities and get everything in place for the busy period between September and Christmas.

The alternative is to sit back and wait and then do all these things in the autumn by which time you are so busy that you don't have time to review and plan. The result is then, in all likelihood, that it gets put off until after the new year and suddenly six months have passed and you are wondering why you are left behind from your competitors. Why would you do that?

So, take my tip - have your break in the summer, certainly, and then use the other six weeks to review where the business is right now, plan your strategies, develop new marketing methods, identify training needs (and if possible deliver what is required), and then start September with everything in place already. If you do this you will almost certainly be ahead of your competition and will be much better placed to optimise the opportunity when others are still trying to catch up.

Like any review process, it is wise to enrol support from those who will help you look at the business without your "rose tinted glasses". With this in mind now is the perfect time to talk to a business coach and explore how they can help you "get all your ducks in a row" over the next few months.

If you would like to speak to us about the support available to you right now that will help you put your plans in place and stay ahead of the competition, give us a call on +44 (0)28 9048 8673 or visit www.simonsmithcoaching.com and we'll arrange to have a conversation with no obligation to you.

Don't fall into the "we can't do anything in the summer" trap. Call us now and take the opportunity to see how you can make the most of your business when others around you are asleep.

Wishing you success!

Making the most of your FREE time

Many people say to me they never have enough time off.

As I sit here outside a shopping centre, waiting for my family to finish doing their thing, I find myself questioning how we define "time off" in the first place!

Last weekend I was enjoying the supportive environment of being with my mastermind group in San Francisco and we were discussing just this topic. Jack Canfield, our group leader, suggests that a FREE day is one where you are doing that which gives you energy and enables you to re-create, as in recreation, from midnight to midnight. It means not opening email, taking work related calls, doing your paperwork, accounts or other more "mundane" activities. It means taking care of yourself, nurturing your body and your mind, relaxing, sleeping, perhaps going to your favourite restaurant, beach, walking spot, getting a massage and so on.

For me, it means all these things and more. It doesn't mean shopping though. My daughter chastised me when I said I would wait in the car. For her, shopping is a real time off activity, and she felt I should want to traipse around the shops with her and enjoy it! No, for me I would rather sit in the car, listen to some relaxing music and just chill out for a couple of hours.

So, in fact my family are actually doing me a favour acting as "Dad's taxi" to take them to the shopping centre. I get to spend some time with myself and relax!

On that basis, despite not necessarily doing those nurturing things that I would perhaps prefer to do, I get to help my family enjoy their free day and I can also make the choice to make my day just as relaxing. By having respect for their preference, and having respect for my own choice, we all get to "win".

My tip then is simply this: make the choice that serves you even when it may seem that there is no choice. I could have chosen to be annoyed that I was having to spend my free time driving my family to the shopping centre, and being dragged in and out of shops I didn't want to be in, OR I could make my own choice and spend some time looking after me at the same time....

Enjoy your weekend!

What's work/life balance really all about?

Richard Branson said that there is no play or work, just living. So, if we are passionate about what we do, and we get excited about it every day, is there really a need to worry about work/life balance?

People regularly tell me they want to create more balance in their lives. They say they work too hard and don’t get enough time off. They don’t spend enough time with their family, don’t have days off, never take a holiday, get up early, go to bed late. It seems to be a constant battle to keep going.

I realised, after doing some “self-development” work with my coach and one of my mastermind groups, that whilst I love what I do, and am absolutely passionate about it, I might have been falling into a “trap” of pushing too hard in one area of life at the possible expense of another. For me, balance is not about work/life, but about the key areas of your whole life. This includes relationships with family and friends, fun and adventure, personal development, business, finance, toys and luxuries, contribution or service, health and fitness. The game of life is about having balance in all these areas so that no one area is suffering at the expense of success in another.

So, I asked myself “how can I create more balance as a whole” and then created goals, planned strategies and took action to make it happen. However, I also realised that planning balance and taking action was great and moved me forward, it was also very easy to allow myself to slip back into my old ways, the ways of my corporate career when everything in life then was about working hard, getting noticed, delivering results, being promoted, earning more money and bonuses, getting the new company car and so on.

It is so easy to work harder when things seem challenging and finding yourself spinning round in circles, beating yourself up when things don’t go the way you planned and then getting back on the roundabout of work, work, work, or rather, effort, effort, effort, losing sight of keeping balance in the other areas. This is the time when it is so important to keep our eye on the ball and allow ourselves to just take some time out to recharge, refocus and connect back with our energy.

I recall when I worked for a company many years ago, driving fork-lift trucks, moving their products around the site. We worked our machine solidly for 10 hours straight every day. The boss would say that the most important job of the day was to plug the fork-lift into it’s charger at the end of the shift, before we left. If this wasn’t done and we returned the following morning we would find no machine available and therefore no work, no money. The fork-lift, like us, needed to literally recharge it’s batteries to be able to function properly, or even at all, the next day.

So my success tips this week are:

1. Review what you do and make sure that you are living your life in terms of living rather than work/life as if they are separate entities. They’re not.
2. Look at where your balance is, or isn’t, and create some goals in those areas that you would like to improve.
3. When things get tough, remind yourself that more “work” doesn’t necessarily mean better results.
4. Take time to recharge your batteries and nurture your mind and body so that you can perform at your best every day.

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Jack Canfield's Key to Living the Law of Attraction

Practical tips beyond the teachings of The Secret, January 17, 2008
By
Mr. Peter S. Smith "Simon Smith www.simonsmit... (Belfast) - See all my reviews

Jack Canfield is the master of The Law of Attraction. He has applied it in his own life and teaches it to the world. Now with his new book he takes The Success Principles he has taught across the world and brings practical insight and tools into understanding of the Law of Attraction. Easy to read, easily understood and easily applied, I have no doubt that applying what Jack teaches will transform lives. Buy it, gift it, share it and talk about it, so that those people important to you don't miss out!

Thank you Jack for being such an inspiration and providing this book to us.

www.amazon.com

How do I get motivated?

I was prompted to respond to a question submitted in a forum I subscribe to about getting back into a state of motivation following the holiday. The person submitting the comment / question was looking for other experiences as they were finding it difficult to get back into “work mode” and get motivated to take action.

My experience is often similar after holidays and Christmas. This year is seemed to be even more difficult than usual.

To move through it I find that taking a couple of days to just "allow" myself to be in this zone of "no specific action", yet thinking / reflecting about the next few months (not even meditating, just allowing my thoughts to go wherever they take me during the course of the day), begins to move me closer to being in action.

After those couple of days I take one day to just update some goals, clear out old paperwork, throw away old to-do lists that probably won't get handled anyway. Just this act of creating some plans and tidying up leads me to a place where I am motivated to plan the next 2 days, by time not tasks, and I plan everything, even getting up, breaks and going to bed.

So, for example, the plan this holiday actually looked like this:

6 - Up
6.30 - Write sales letter
7.45 - Shower & breakfast
9 - Travel (listen to Jack Canfield CD)
10 - Car service (read Catherine Ponder book while waiting)
12 - Travel home (listen to HWnW interview CD)
1 - Client preparation for tomorrow (sandwich lunch)
3 - Write letters to clear up financial incompletes
3.30 - Call GW, ML, CD
4 - Gym
5 - Shower & break
6 - Email, sync iPOD for podcasts, back up laptop
7 - Mastermind (2) call
8 - Plan for tomorrow
8.30 - Client preparation
9 - Client preparation
10 - End of day review
10.30 - Bed

By planning like this, instead of by a to-do list, I am focused on the time, not the task, thereby less likely to use my own very efficient "avoidance tactics" and revert to "vegging out" in front of another great movie, and much more likely to be in action all day. The important thing for me is that even if some of the tasks don't get completed, I am being focused again on working activities and because it is time oriented I can not move a task somewhere else because there is no time allowed for that. I have effectively backed myself into a corner to stay on track.

One more day like this and I hit the sack exhausted but fully back into normality so to speak, so I can then allow myself to be less intense about the planning knowing I'm back to where I need / want to be.


Sign up for our free Success Tips at www.simonsmithcoaching.com and get further “Reflections” delivered to your inbox.

Check out our monthly free teleseminar at www.AskSimonSmith.com. This month’s expert guest is Melanie Donelly answering your questions as a Recruitment Professional on how you can improve the results in your recruitment business.

The Power of the Law of Attraction

There has been so much discussion and a heightened sense of awareness about the law of attraction since the film and book The Secret was created and subsequently put into the hands of millions of people through Rhonda Byrne and her supporters.

I first encountered the principles behind the law of attraction when the film was introduced to me at a training event in 2006. Since then, and following much more research, conversation, practice and self-discovery, I have found that when we set our intentions with the true belief that we create everything we experience in life, the principles really do work. Now these principles are not some “woo woo, out of this world codswallop”, but real and meaningful ways to attract into our lives what we aim for.

The power of setting your intention and attracting into your life what you intend exists, whether or not you believe it. However, when you are clear exactly what you do want to create, and I mean really clear, you will manifest great things if you choose to. On the other hand, if you ignore the principles of “we are and get what we create through our intention”, you may experience life differently to that which you say you would choose at a conscious level.

So what does this really mean?

What we focus on, we create. If we focus on what we want, we create it. If we focus on what we don’t want, the same is true, we create it - in other words we create what we don’t want. Confused? Yes, so was I to begin with, and coming from a cynical view in the early days, I almost refused to believe this could be true. This would mean that I would need to be taking total and unconditional responsibility for everything I said or thought and that I would be unable to blame others for anything, because I have created it, exactly as I said I wanted it!

So, my experience is this; when I have stated or thought an intention, truly believing that it is truth, I get or experienced what I intended. When I created a vision board with a TV camera pointing at a photo from a seminar I had previously delivered, a few days later a media Company called to ask if they could film my next seminar. When I put picture of a black-tie dinner on my board, I imagined I would be invited to be the after dinner speaker. Within weeks I was invited to speak as the after dinner speaker at a student union conference. When I was stuck with a headline that I was attracted to which read “My resolution - somewhere out there are kids that need our help”, I pasted it on to my career board, for no apparent reason and subsequently have been working with young people in a variety of different ways, realising this was what I truly wanted, amongst other things. Most recently, I had an idea for a corporate sponsor to support coaching young people who don’t have the resources to purchase self development programmes. Within two days I received a phone call which may result in just such a programme becoming a reality.

Conversely, when I have been focussed on the lack of money, we have received bills we weren’t expecting. When I have been focussed on being overweight, I put weight on. When I have focussed on being tired, I have had no energy.

Last week, I met a friend at a breakfast event and we discussed how she and her husband could not seem to get clear on where they were going over the next few years. It seemed to me that they might be stuck in trying to work out how they were going to get to where they wanted to be rather than being clear on what they really wanted and being open to the possibility that the how would show up once they had that clarity, (when I coach people around discovering their passions and their visions for the future we start with the intention that getting clear on “the what” is the first step). Later that day, I saw this friend again at a different event and she had subsequently had a conversation with her husband and they had become clear that this was exactly what the problem was and they could now move forward focussing on what they want, knowing that “the how” will show up just as it is supposed to.

I’ve had many conversations with people on how we “use” the law of attraction and the power of setting our intentions. I suggest that we can’t “use” it, we simply believe it and then monitor our thoughts and our intentions very closely and we will become more aligned with the universe and the energy that will conspire to support us in creating what we want.

My experience has been simple when I reflect back on it. The more I notice that the law of attraction is how the universe operates, the more I am able to get clearer on what I want and the more I am able to create what I want. When I set a vague intention I get a vague result. When I have some doubt, the doubt becomes the reality. When I am clear on the what, the how will show up!




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Playing the Game

I was at a seminar last night in Dublin and the trainer presented us with what he described as three of the most important keys to success in business:

Critical Thinking
Culture
My Idea + My Experience = Disaster

Whilst much of the material was not new, he did get me thinking about critical thinking time and he suggested two questions which occurred to me could be very powerful to consider.

The first was based on the idea of shifting our thinking from “How do I win this game?” to “How am I going to play this second half?”

So, if I consider that life is a game, not of chance but of skill, then it seems to me that we are far more likely to enjoy the process if we do indeed adopt a position of “How am I going to play this second half?” rather than “How do I win?”.

As Art Linkletter asked in a CD programme I listened to on the way home; “How do you make God laugh? – tell him your plans!”

The second question which got me thinking was:

“What if I was given the opportunity to have one last thought – what would it be?”

It seems to me that if we were playing the game of life for the fun of it and just enjoying the process rather than the constant striving to have more, get more, earn more, buy more, we might enjoy and appreciate the people around us more. We might be more inclined to help others around us. We might be more thankful for the gifts that we have. We might be more generous in our opinions of others. We might be less interested in our image or our clothes and more interested in being ourselves. We might be willing to make more mistakes and learn from them.

We might be more willing to play full out!

So I concluded that if were given the opportunity to have one last thought I would probably like it to be:

“Wow! That was so much fun!”




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What is Inspiration?

I’ve just got off a call to my coach and we’ve been discussing inspiration. The light bulb came on for me when I looked at the meaning of the word and found that one definition is “the drawing of air into the lungs; inhalation” which implies that inspiration comes from the inside. If this is true then my job as a coach and trainer is to “be inspired” from the inside with the intention of “being inspirational” on the outside.

When I think about the people who have provided inspiration for me, too numerous to list, I very quickly conclude the reason they inspired me is because they were first inspired themselves. They have an internal energy and motivation that comes from a desire to learn, grow, improve and develop, soaking up new information and insights and sharing these with those around them.

If then, my purpose is to inspire others; I must first “Be Inspired”. If I choose this path of service to support people in living a fulfilled and happy life, create success in their career or business, relationships, health and leisure, personal growth and contribution, my responsibility to them is to be inspired myself.

So, when I am “looking for inspiration” which is a phrase I find myself using often when I am writing or preparing for a coaching or training session, I might first look inside, perhaps through meditation or simple quiet reflection, and search for where I am inspired. It is no surprise therefore that when I look back, some of my most interesting insights have come whilst meditating or being around people who are themselves inspired in some way.

This then serves to reinforce the point that we should indeed surround ourselves with people who have a positive impact on us, who inspire us in some way.

So, my invitation is simply this: Consider who you surround yourself with in your day to day life. Are they inspired? Do they provide you with inspiration? If not, what steps might you take to provide that inspiration in your life?

Be Inspired!

Times of Change - Raising a Superstar

I’ve recently been inspired by the book “Raising a Superstar” by Terri Khonsari whom I met in the summer not knowing that she was about to publish her book.

Terri gives some solid, practical advice on how to raise a superstar child, having faced many challenges in her own life during the process of raising her very own superstar, Nilou.

Reading the book led me to ask myself questions about how we’ve raised our own children, especially my daughter, who at 15 years old is going through the usual tremendous amount of physical and emotional change. The boys are now all grown up, left home and got their own children, partners, careers and adult lives. Charlotte on the other hand, is still on her journey to adulthood.

I question where we went right and where we could have done better. Did we give too much and rob her of her independence or did we give too little and make her too independent? Could we have been more active in her education, teaching her about money, giving to other people, health, spirituality and so on? How will she fare in the big wide world once she has decided to leave the coup and fly?

For my part, one thing I know for sure is that we always do the best we can with the skills, knowledge and experience that we have at any given time. It continues to be our responsibility however, to build and develop our skills and knowledge and use that to support our children as they grow and continue their own development. That’s why I recommend this book wholeheartedly to help you support your children to be who they really are and raise your very own superstar!

To get the book now click on the link below:
www.simonsmithcoaching.com/recommendedreading/index.asp

Feeling the fear and doing it anyway

How many times do we avoid doing something because we have decided that we will fail before we have even tried? How many times do we create a predetermined result before we can possibly know what that result will be? How many times have we missed out because we chose not face our fear?

In the early years of my career I worked with children who had learning disabilities combined with what we called “severe behaviour problems”. That is to say, they had learned to respond to the world through “unacceptable social behaviour”. Some were violent, to themselves or others; some would tantrum, scream, shout, spit, vomit and so on. In all cases the behaviour would show up because they had been unable to communicate what they wanted effectively enough to get the result they desired.

We often created situations for these children that would help develop their experiences of the world. For example, we would take them on adventure trips where they would abseil, climb rocks, canoe, go potholing and the like.

On one of these trips we had been taken by our instructors to a beautiful little village in the Lake District of NW England, where the locals and visiting adventurers alike would jump off the bridge into the river some 60 or 70 feet below. The children in our charge ate their picnic lunch on the river bank below watching the continuous activity of a steady stream of people jumping off the bridge with a wild scream, plunging into the water and disappearing for several seconds before emerging with laughter and shouts of delight at their achievement.

Inspired by the excitement I decided I wanted to have a go at this and overcome my “fear” of heights once and for all and experience the amazing fun these people were apparently having. No sooner than I had said it, one of the instructors took me up to the bridge, jumped off and then waited for me to follow.

I stood on the wall of that bridge for over 45 minutes playing it over in mind, anticipating all the things that would go wrong; landing badly, hurting my feet as I hit the water, crashing against an unseen rock, not coming back up out of the water. I also began to anticipate the embarrassment of not doing it, not going through with my commitment, being laughed at and ridiculed. I told myself, 1-2-3 jump. No, in a minute. 1-2-3 jump. No, I can’t do it. 1-2-3 and now, jump! No, I’m scared. And so it went on until finally the instructors, all of whom were desperately encouraging me said “look, we’ve got to go now so jump or get down”. I got down.

It took me another 20 years to face that fear, when I finally did jump. The opportunity replayed in a different way with a skydive. Jumping out of a perfectly good aircraft at 13,000 feet seemed like a great way to finally overcome this fear that I had told myself I had had all my life. The difference with this, as the instructor had said during the training “when you’re sat on the edge of the plane, with your feet hanging out the door and the noise of the wind is unbearable, you can still say NO….however it so often sounds like GO!”

By putting myself in a situation where I would be pushed to succeed and face that fear, was what it took. And the experience itself? Wow! One of the most exhilarating activities of my life! The rush, the freedom, the excitement, the buzz. It was truly amazing.

I had missed out on an amazing experience twenty years earlier because I had failed to “face the fear and do it anyway”. Since then I promised myself to “just do it now”. Is this easy all the time? No. Do I succeed all the time? Not at all. And yet, when I do, when I believe in myself, the results always exceed my expectations.

My invitation to you is this: consider when you are pre-determining the result of an experience before you have allowed yourself to LIVE the experience, and when you let go of your thoughts you might be pleasantly surprised. So just go for it anyway!

What is Success?

First published in my newsletter - August 2007 (visit www.simonsmithcoaching.com to sign up)

Interesting, I find, that almost without exception, when I initially ask people what they define as success they respond with a list of material things.

I recall when I first listed my goals several years ago I wrote about the big car, new house, holidays, x amount of money, travel to exotic locations etc etc. These are all important to me in some way but as I move along my own Inspired Journey of discovery, I now have an awareness that success, true success that is, is far more powerful than having £2,000,000 in the bank.

True success for me is about being totally and unconditionally in the moment, living life now, living my life on purpose and taking real pleasure from each and every moment. Just being me, just as I am; knowing that I am good enough.

I used to beat myself up, comparing myself to others and always coming off second best. I used to think I wasn’t good enough to achieve my dreams, didn’t deserve the next promotion, didn’t meet the expectations of those closest to me or my boss or my peers. I used to think that everyone else sat in judgement of me. I used to think that others would always be more successful.

So, I dreamed of the car, the house, the holidays, the travel but never really believing it could or would become reality. I dreamed of being my own boss one day. I dreamed of being exceptional on the cricket pitch. I dreamed of having a huge network of friends across the world. I dreamed of having millions, winning the lottery.

And then, after so much discovery, heartache, joy, love, passion and learning I came to realise that if I could just be present, in the here and now; if I could just enjoy the moment because it is, and I am; if I could just be me, right here, right now, then I didn’t need to dream anymore. Sure, I still have goals and desires, but now I just enjoy the moment, the journey, the discovery, whenever I can. And then I know… I am truly successful. I have already achieved!

Busy as a Bee - Focus on Action Creates Results

From my newsletter (visit www.simonsmithcoaching.com to sign up) - June 2007

Summer is well and truly here and the activity of nature is all around us.

Over the last few days, with this glorious weather, I have been enjoying my first cup of tea of the day in the garden, watching nature at work. We have a dozen or so bees that are there every morning, busy busy busy, collecting nectar from our flowers and one plant in particular.

These wonderful creatures have an attitude of focussing on results, that if we were to replicate each and every day, it seems to me we could not fail in our efforts to succeed.

The bee is never distracted from its mission, regardless of what is going on around it. It finds an appropriate source of nectar and applies itself to the task, collecting its prize, filling itself up until the time it can not collect any more. After returning to base, depositing its fortunes in the safety and security of the community safe, it returns to apply its labour once more to the task in hand. It is absolutely focussed on results and does so taking full responsibility for its actions.

The bee does not blame its surroundings, its colleagues, its family, it simply stays focussed on its goal, and achieves, time and time again. Granted, when it is threatened, it reacts to protect itself and when left to its own work, it just stays on track and delivers results.

As I watched the bees do their work, focussing on the results they want, I realised that we are so often distracted by events or people that keep us from what we truly want. Most of the time, we don’t even realise we are allowing ourselves to be diverted, and then we create reasons for why we haven’t achieved that which we set out to create.

We are bombarded with 2,000,000 bits of information per second and we use our internal filters of attitudes, values, beliefs, memories, decisions, language and meta programs (the way we think and operate), to filter all those bits of information, to create our internal map of the world. The challenge is that we can only consciously focus on 7 things (+ or – 2) at any one time.

It is no surprise therefore that the most successful people in life are absolutely focussed on those things that are most important to them. Studies of people like Mahatma Ghandi, Mother Theresa, Richard Branson, Donald Trump, Dr Stephen Covey, John Gray, Denis Waitley, Mark Victor Hansen, Jack Canfield, Anthony Robbins, and so on and so on, show the common factor with all of them is just this; they are all clear and then focus on, what is most important to them. They know their top five “passions” and take focussed action towards them.

It is obvious to me therefore, that like the bees, once we take complete responsibility for the results in our life, get clarity on what is most important to us, and then take action, completely focussed on what we want to achieve (as opposed to what we don’t want), then we can only lead a successful, happy and fulfilled life…